Wednesday, February 22, 2012

I Don't Know Calculus

So, I swear, every day after I write a post I think of 6 other things I could have written about instead.  Yet, come the next day, poof, it's all out of my brain.  I used to pre-write posts, but that sort of eliminates the daily therepudic effect that writing every morning has for me.  So here I am sitting again, trying to figure out what's up in my brain in between frantic notes-to-self to remember to do my public economics assignment and daydreams of a new bikini. 

Though this blog reeks of snarky sarcasm and an impressive number of rants about things that annoy me, I consider myself a very friendly person.  I will talk to just about anyone, and I try hard to be nice to people just because.  Weird, right?  You all thought I was some angsty grouchy feminist behind a Macbook, didn't you?  Grouchy is true if I haven't had my coffee.  Angsty, not so much.  And although I have aspirations to be successful on my own, I wear a bra and have no problems making my future husband sandwiches.  Oh, and I am currently using a Windows PC.  Did I just blow your mind? 

So, back to how I'm charming, delightful, and friendly.  I think it's a great quality to have, if I do say so myself.  (I should probably add some humility and humble pie to that list, but I'd rather stare at myself in reflective surfaces and tell myself how beautiful I am today, sorry).  Doesn't it make your day when someone sincerely compliments your outfit?  Or when someone holds the door for you, even though you're clearly 10 paces behind and they didn't have to?  Well, why can't I be that person and brighten someone else's day?  I'd like to think I can try. 

There's that old saying about scoring more flies with honey than with vinegar.  Let's be serious, when has anyone ever wanted flies?  I want a step towards my career.  Why do big-time firms look for high GPAs and the ability to do calculus and whip up regression formulas in your head instead of people skills?  Why is being adaptable, friendly, professional, and charming under-rated?  Or am I just not looking in the right field?  Sure, I have a good GPA and can partially derive things that don't include logarithms... but so can everyone else in my major.  The difference between them and me is that I don't want to hold a conversation with them.  Whoops, I think my confidence is showing, which apparently is a very intimidating trait for a female to exhibit.  You can teach me how to manage risk with derivatives, but you can't teach personality. 

Now before you go saying to yourself "Self, this girl thinks she can glide by on her good looks and charisma, but that's not going to fly because I've spent the past 20 years of my life hittin' the books and it's not that easy," I'll tell you that I know this.  I'm not an economics major because I can meet a cute hubby in my classes.  (It's quite the contrary, actually.  Woof).  I'm just saying that it's a little discouraging that being obnoxiously specialized in one area is more valuable than being well-rounded. 

I suppose I'm freaking out about nothing.  I have, like, 4 months left to flounder around and enjoy my youth.  I have the rest of my life to worry about the rest of my life.  And if that doesn't work out, RENT kinda made being poor look like fun, minus the AIDS-and-dying part. 

Love,
N

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